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How do you survive newborn twins?
You just brought twin babies from the hospital and you’re now wondering how the heck you’re going to make it through the first week with newborn twins?
I mean that first night with twins is going to be hard and like you, I wasn’t sure how life was twin newborns were going to be.
And even though I’m a nurse. I was still scared as sh*t.
There is a difference between teaching parents how to take care of their babies vs now I’m the one who needs to do it.
I’m not going to sugar coded. It not going to be easy is a constant roller coaster and at times you’re going to want to pull your hair out.
But you will survive!
These tips and tricks (below) are going to teach you how to survive twin newborns and make it out alive. Yes, dramatic but twins are hard. And you need lots of resources and patience.
- Give yourself a break
- Sense of humor
- Be flexible
- Get help
- Schedules galore
- Share night responsibilities
- Find support
- The importance of memberships
- The right twin gear and items
- Learn to embrace the mess
- A crying baby is a breathing baby
Give yourself a break
You just delivered newborn twins. That’s a lot of freaking work. It took a lot out of you not only physically but also mentally.
Take a deep breath, keep your expectations low, and take it one day at a time. Your life has changed completely by two and life ain’t going to be perfect and that’s ok.
Embrace it. And keep it moving.
What type of mom would I be if I didn’t recommend coffee…
My first night with newborn twins was rough. I knew that moving forward I was going to need a boost to help me stay awake.
I know caffeine is not for everyone and if you’re nursing you might need to limit it or won’t be able to have any.
But if for some reason you can. Do it. At this point in life, I don’t know if coffee is more of a soothing thing OR an I just like the smell of its thing.
The first week with twin’s coffee was my BFF. It gave me the extra energy needed to survive the day.
Some if you’re not a coffee drinker then I’m not telling you that you need to become one but it might help you get through the day.
And if all things failed it will give you something to look forward to every single morning.
Sense of humor
One thing I quickly had to learn after bringing twins home from the hospital was how stressful balancing it all can be.
The choice was to either:
A. Be stress all of the freaking time OR
B. Laugh it out and just roll with it
Taking care of twins and sometimes if you’re doing it alone it can be stressful and challenging. Find the balance. Don’t sweat the small stuff.
Learn to just laugh and not take your life so seriously…
You will be surprised as to how much easier things will go when you choose to laugh rather than to work yourself up for things that at times you can’t control.
You have two newborns which means two sets of personalities, different needs, wants, and so on.
You won’t be able to win them all… Just do your best and keep it moving.
Before I had twins I was that person with an A-Z plan. Not saying that you can’t have plans with twins because you should have a schedule to stay sane.
What I mean is that you need to be flexible…
Remember you have two babies with completely different personalities. At times what works for one might now work for the other.
Surviving twin infants is all about trial and error, keeping them alive and fed and figure your babies out.
In order to do all of that, you need to be open to trying different things and just roll with the punches.
Whether you pay for it or you have family or friends come help DO IT.
The first couple of weeks with newborn twins are hard. Not only are you trying to heal but you’re also needing to feed, change, and just keep two babies alive.
Having an extra set of hands will make the process even easier.
Whether they help with feeding, changing diapers, waking up in the middle of the night, or just simply watching over them so that you can nap or shower. Will be life-changing.
This will be extra beneficial once your spouse goes back to work and you’re home all by yourself.
You can definitely take care of newborn twins by yourself but if you have people that are wanting to help let them.
Even if all they can do is bringing you food. That’s one less thing you will have to worry about.
You need to embrace you inner Oprah because you get a schedule and you get a schedule and everyone gets a schedule.
And everyone wakes up at the same time.
Newborn Twins Schedule
You need to keep them on the same schedule. You’re going to get sick of hearing that over and over again. But this is key for not losing your damn mind.
I know that each baby is different and they might each have their own demands. But you need to try to follow the same schedule as much as you can.
The same eat, sleep, diaper, play, and repeat again and again for both of them.
With twin babies, you don’t have the luxury to improvise and to just do whatever all day… You need structure to stay sane.
Obviously, twins aren’t ready for a strict schedule such as at 7 am wake up and 8 am eat, and so on.
What I mean by keeping them in the same schedule is just whatever you do for one do it for the other. Yes is a lot of work all at once especially if you’re doing it solo.
But once you’re done you will have a few minutes to breathe before you need to do it all over again.
You need to wake up the sleeping twin
I know we have been told to NEVER wake up a sleeping baby but with newborn twins, YOU MUST. You have no choice
Unless you want to spend all day and all night feeding babies then you need to wake up the sleeping one.
You will soon learn which one of your newborn twins sleeps the longest. For us, it was our boy so we would literally wake him up in order to feed both of them at the same time.
And yes it is ok for one twin to want to sleep more than the other. Remember they are two different babies. So two different sleeping habits.
But when you’re trying to survive especially the first couple of weeks then you need to wake up the sleeping one.
Our baby twins ate every 3 hours because they were jaundice and lost a lot of weight so our pediatrician hands us on a strict feeding schedule in order for them to gain weight quicker.
Our daughter was the alarm clock. Is like she knew is what time to eat because she would literally wake up right on the dot.
To this date, she is still the one saying “eat eat” when are breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
To this date, we STILL use this tip. And they are almost two.
Doing everything at the same time has allowed me to tend to my other son and get things done around the house.
And even get some ME time
So please wake up the sleeping twin. I know it’s hard but remember you want to survive and stay sane. So Do it.
Share night responsibilities
If you’re wanting to get a chunk of sleep at a time. Then take turns with night duty.
Whether is your husband, family member, or friend. Instead of everyone being up at the same time assign schedules.
This tip is only helpful for the mommas who are not breastfeeding.
The way it worked for my family is that I did the first part of the night and my husband did the second part of the night.
We were able to each get about 4 hours of solid sleep. If that’s not life goals I don’t know what is.
Find twin mom support
The newborn stage with twins is long and can also be pretty lonely.
Reach out to other twin mommas whether locally, online, groups, etc. It doesn’t matter. Find other people that can truly understand your unique situation.
Twins are hard to raise and trying to survive those first couple of weeks with newborns is even tougher.
Find other twin mommas that can answer questions, give you confidence, and assure you that everything you’re feeling and going through is completely normal.
Feel free to reach out to me if you can’t find anyone. That’s why I’m here and that the reason this blog was created.
The right twin gear and items
You don’t need two of everything but you do need certain gear, clothing, and items to make taking care of twins much easier.
A safe place to put them
Unfortunately, you have two babies and you can’t spend all day holding them. You need a safe place to put them.
whether thats a :
It doesn’t matter get something. We had rockers that we still use to this date and the twins are almost 2.
This is great because it allows you to have a place to feed them if you need to do it alone and also serves as a safe place for them to hang out while you do other mom things.
Or just get a moment for yourself to breathe.
Do keep in mind that each baby is unique so they might not like the same item.
For example, we had two of the same rockers but we also had a swing from our previous child.
We used the swing a lot with our daughter because she loved it more than the rocker.
It might be better to start with one item from the different categories. Like instead of buying two rockers, two bouncers, two swings.
Bottles and burp clothes
You need bottles and more bottles… Why? Because ain’t nobody got time to be washing bottles every 5 seconds.
My babies eventually went to daycare so I needed to have enough bottles for each feeding.
TIP: Start out with one bottle from one brand and see how your baby does with it…
Trust me some babies can be picky so you don’t want to put all your eggs in one basket.
We used the Philip Avent natural bottles but all three of my babies would literally drink out of any kind.
With bottles comes mess… So you need absorbent burp cloths.
We use the Gerber diaper cloths as burp clothes… YES, they are meant for cloth diapering but let me tell you they are the best. And for a reason.
When you’re dealing with spit, vomit, and any bodily fluid you want something that is going to absorb and not just go straight through you.
Babies are messy and no you will still end up with fluids on you but with these burp cloths you will minimize the mess being everywhere.
Swaddles for dummies
YES, I call them that… Why? because they make swaddling a lot easier.
Coming from a previous postpartum nurse I have mastered the art of swaddling but when you have two is all about TIME…
You’re going to be sick of this word by the end of this post.
A big tip to surviving twins is maximizing your time so that you can focus on other things.
So even though I can swaddle a baby just fine… The swaddles for dummies just make the process much simpler.
The swaddles for dummies are like little straight jackets. You put the baby inside of it and just velcro one side then the other and you’re done.
Your babies are going to spend the majority of their time being swaddle… You need a swaddle that is going to make it easier.
You don’t want to spend all day fighting with a stupid blanket or watching youtube videos on how to… When you have so many more things to do.
And the worse part is that after you spent all of your time fighting with the blanket and then you finally get the baby swaddle…
You realize that your baby figures out a way to get out of it.
Easy access clothing
Having twins is all about time and time. I know we all want to dress up the baby and put on cute clothes but during the newborn stage, you need to keep things simple.
You’re going to be changing a lot of diapers day and night and the last thing you want to do is to mess with 50 buttons.
Make it easier on yourself by buying pajamas with zippers, magnets, and/or gowns only.
Easy in easy out.
You will truly appreciate this tip when you’re changing a middle of the night diaper and you can barely keep your eyes open.
The importance of memberships
So what the heck do I mean by a membership?
Think Prime, Sams, Costco, etc, etc… It doesn’t matter which one but YOU need one they are going to save you TIME and MONEY.
Let’s say you have prime which I know the majority of all of us do… I mean I’m sure the UPS guy knows me by name. Prime was a lifesaver in the newborn stage.
I knew if I needed diapers ASAP and didn’t have time to go to the store I could place an order and get them within two days.
I know amazon diapers might be a little pricier than going to Walmart or Target but when you’re busy with newborn twins… Going to the store is not a priority.
You can easily get on the app and order whatever baby supplies you might need until you can get to a physical store.
They also have an option to get on a monthly subscription if you choose to do so. When you choose that route it saves you a little bit of money.
Memberships allow you to buy in bulk
If you don’t have prime. Having something like a Sams or Costco membership is also beneficial.
We also have a Sams membership because going from a family of three to a family of five buying in bulk is a MUST.
It has allowed us to save tons of money and time.
Sams or Costco sells baby items in larger quantities. This means you don’t need to be at the store every 5 minutes because you ran out of diapers.
Buying in bulk is going to become your new BFF. And besides buying baby items you can also buy freezer meals and household supplies.
So while you’re pregnant get on the Sams or Costco website to get familiar with what they have and the items you might be interested in buying for your twins. Or the whole family.
Target Cartwheel App
If you’re tight on money then having the target app is also a great choice for baby item deals. Because the app is totally FREE
For my mommas out there that don’t know that target has their own app well they do and is amazing.
Target is my zen place.. Or so my husband calls it.
I love target because is a one-stop-shop plus I can also grab a cup of coffee while I shop… I mean can I get an AMEN… What more do we need in life?
Target is the store you go in for one item and come out owning the whole store. Y’all Target get me every time…
But let’s get back to the app… The app has different categories and in each category, there are specific items that are running a sale.
They always have something on the baby category…
I like to browse this category every time I’m needing to buy diapers, wipes, etc.
I take advantage of the spend $100 get a $20 gift card… They seem to have this promotion often. I mean $20 is a box of wipes… If you live close to a target look into this.
Sometimes the promotion is available online. So for the mommas out there who don’t live close to a Target, check online and order away.
Learn to embrace the mess
Look you just had twins.. say bye bye-bye to a clean house ( I just embrace my inner NSYNC) and HELLO to mess.
Your priority is to take care of yourself and your newborn babies… Nothing else
Let friends and family come and help you…. and if they bring food even better. Don’t let your ego win…
It’s hard enough with one baby and you had two. Be ok with chaos.
Prioritize. Naps > cleaning. I know we all want a clean/organized house but while you’re adjusting to your new life focus on YOU and the babies.
For me, naps, shower, brushing my teeth, and even my skincare were my priorities.
Figure out what matters most to you and focus on that. Let others help you with the rest.
A crying baby is a breathing baby
This is going to sound harsh but with newborn twins say goodbye to pleasing everyone. YOU can’t.
You have two babies that are completely different… They aren’t always going to be happy and that’s ok.
At some point, someone will be crying and it isn’t much you can do… Just breathe and know that you are doing everything that you can.
JUST REMEMBER THEY ARE CRYING THEY ARE BREATHING.
At the end of the day as long as they are fed, changed, and no one got hurt then we all survived the day.
My twins are almost two and we still deal with this issue. You have two babies with different temperaments.
You’re going to have to learn to deal with crying and whining for the rest of your lives.
Or at least until they leave your house. And they go and whine somewhere else.
Final words for surviving the early months with twins
The first week with twins is hard. Take it one day at a time.
Learn to prioritize, ask for help, and most importantly focus on just taking care of yourself and the babies.
Everything else takes a back seat.
Keep your expectations low and if all things failed then just laugh about it.. Or at least that’s what I do.
Laughing helps me decompress and not take my crazy/chaotic life so seriously. FIND something that helps you feel better and DO IT.
Because when you’re finding yourself in all of the craziness is the little things that will keep you afloat.
I would love to hear what has helped you survive life with twins. Share in the comments.
Other twin related articles:
- Twin mom blogs
- Online twin breastfeeding resources
- Pros and cons of having twins
- How to get twins on a schedule
- Newborn twin schedule printable
- How to take care of twins alone
- Things you can expect the first month with twins
How to manage newborn twins
I’m B the creator of Twins Made Easy. I’m an RN BSN MNN, wife, and mother to three kids (including boy/girl twins). Sharing and helping you survive twin life and more one coffee at a time. Read more
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2 thoughts on “How to Survive Newborn Twins Without Losing your Damn Mind”
I love your blog. It is helping me lose some of the fear I have about bringing twins into the world. Thank you!
Hi Angel, I’m so glad! Let me know how else I can help and congratulations by the way… Twins are a lot of work but they are also so much fun!